This past Saturday night we decide to head to the mall to hang out for the night.  We had no particular agenda… just to walk around and spend some time hanging out.  As we wandered we came upon a bookstore and it occurred to me that there was a new book I wanted to get.  I quickly asked my husband “Hey, do you mind if I pop in here for a minute?  There’s a book I want.”

This comes as no real shock to Merlyn.  (Well, and probably not to you either.  It’s no secret I read a lot.) Other than maybe rolling his eyes because he knows this will be longer than “a minute”, he kindly indulges my inability to pass a bookstore without going in.

Immediately I dash off.  This time I’m a little anxious and in a hurry.  I quickly start scouring the store looking for the Christian book section.  I figure this one has to be easy to spot.  Surely it’s on an end cap.  It’s only by one of the biggest Christian authors of our generation.

“Yep, there it is.  Oh man, right smack in the middle of the store screaming the title So Long, Insecurity.  Ok, quick just read the back cover and grab a copy.  Maybe people will think I’m getting it for someone else.”

There I was being insecure about buying a book about insecurity.

Yep, I guess this one’s for me.

Even later when my husband asked me what I was reading, I simply said “Beth Moore’s new book.”  Even still, in my own home, with my husband of 11 years I was afraid to admit that I was reading a book about insecurity.

And while I’ve just started it, I’m convinced that this may be one of the most important books Beth has written for our generation.  As I talk with, mentor and encourage other women leaders, I’m becoming more and more convinced that our disease of insecurity is eating us alive and sabotaging the dreams God has for our lives.

If you even think there’s a chance you need to read this book, I want to encourage you to take the leap and get it.

Are you ready to say so long to insecurity too?

Have you ever counted the number of times you look in the mirror?

I decided to do an experiment and count for one day how many glances in the mirror I take, but… I lost count.  Yeah, it was that many times!

What I did discover is that because appearance matters to me (much more than it should), I have built in opportunities to check my reflection.  There is a mirror in all my bathrooms, a full length mirror in my bedroom, a compact mirror in my purse and most public restrooms have plenty of mirrors for me to use.

We know this to be true, when something is important to us we find ways to build it into our lives.  We build habits and create dependencies.

One of the things that I’m learning most about my leadership these days is the importance of building in time for self-reflection – to look at my soul in the mirror.

According to Bill George’s book “True North” one of the top 5 issues that can pull you from your True North as a leader is lack of self-awareness, or self-reflection.

Bill George says:

“Many leaders, especially those early in their careers, are trying so hard to establish themselves in this world that they leave little time for self-exploration.”

Charles Ringma said it this way:

“Because the desire to influence others is always fraught with the danger of illusion and the power to control, self-reflection is required to unmask our own pretensions, to purify our motivations, and to spur us forward in true humility.”

These truths are hitting me smack between the eyes right now.  Self-reflection can’t happen just occasionally.  To look in the mirror of my soul on a consistent basis, I have to create the structure for it in my life.  I have to have build in opportunities to look into the mirror on a regular, consistent basis.  I have to create self-reflection mirrors wherever I can.

My self-reflection mirrors include:

• Purposefully asking those closest to me for candid, constructive feedback at least once a week.
• Scheduling time twice a week to read and reflect on a personal or spiritual growth area for me
• To regularly journal my thoughts, feeling and emotions
• To pray daily for greater awareness of my inadequacies and insecurities

Have you built the self-reflection mirror into your life?

What habits have you created that help you do this well?

Proverbs 22:7

The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender.

Just this week I was working with our bank and found myself so frustrated by all their demands.  I was thinking, “We’ve been their customer for many years, why is it so difficult to get their help when we need it?, “As long as we’re giving them money they love us, once we ask for help, we get scrutinized like crazy.”,  “Why don’t they trust us?”, etc.

And of course God brings this verse front and center for me.  I actually quoted it out loud a few times in my frustration.

It’s just practical wisdom – the borrower is servant to the leader. Period.

I remember when my husband and I first got married.  Each of us had foolishly racked up some credit card debt in college, so when we combined all of our finances we realized we had some problems….

I’m hosting the discussion for Proverbs 22 over at the 31 Day Challenge blog.  Hop on over to hear the rest of the story…

Hope deferred makes the heart sick.

Proverbs 13:12

I’ve been quiet the last few days since the tragedy in Haiti.  Not because I’m not interested.  Not because my heart doesn’t hurt.  Not because I don’t care.

Because my heart is sick.

Because I’m personally fighting for hope.

I’m fighting for hope for myself so that I can get involved and “do something!”

And I’m fighting for hope for every Haitian who so desperately needs it.  I’m fighting for hope for the person in the States who can’t get a hold of their loved ones in Haiti.  I’m fighting for hope for the child wandering aimlessly through the streets looking for their mom.  I’m fighting for hope for the ones who are angry and pillaging.  I’m fighting for hope for a government that needs to lead without corruption.  I’m fighting for hope for the agencies and organizations who are trying to figure out where to begin in their relief efforts.

Will you fight for hope with me?

There are a lot of great organizations to support who are already doing great work to bring hope to Haiti.  I’m personally a big fan of Compassion International.  If you are still looking for a place to give, I would encourage you to check out Compassion.