There is an art to communication.

Great communicators inspire us to be better, motivate us to act and encourage us to dream.

In all of my efforts through the years to grow as a leader, I under-valued the importance of growing as a communicator until recently.  Because my job doesn’t require speaking to masses of people each week, I simply underestimated the importance.

The truth is that great leaders need to be great communicators.  Whether speaking to a team of three or an arena of 10,000, good communication skills are necessary for leading people well.

I recently got a copy of Tim Elmore’s new book Habitudes for Communicators and I love it!

Communication is a lost art and we need to resurrect it.

Look around you. In our culture, we often fail at the fundamentals. Having a conversation without an electronic device involved. Writing a thank-you letter. Listening in earnest to a friend in need. Our human exchanges lead us to learn, transform, revolutionize, innovate, connect and love.

Like the other Habitudes books, this book is filled with images that represent timeless principles, to be read, discussed and applied on a team. The images in this book revolve around engaging and communicating with the next generation. You’ll learn how to communicate effectively through images like Windows and Mirrors, #3 Pencil, House of Fire, the Faded Flag, School Yearbook and more.

I encourage you to get a few copies and study this together with your team!

Get all the details here!

By title I am the rule maker and the rule keeper.  It’s kind of a given as the Executive Director of an organization.

But guess what?

I hate rules, policies & most procedures. 

Most of the time they are a necessary evil.  On a few occasions they are necessary.  On most occasions they’re evil.

Why do I hate them? 

Rules, policies & most procedures are the easy way out.  They’re a scapegoat for true leadership.

Policies are usually a reactionary fix to an issue you’d rather avoid.  Oftentimes we create a policy when we want to avoid a tough conversation.  Rather than address the specific person and the issue, we create a policy to hide behind.

However there are occasions where some parameters need to be established.  I like to call these filters.

Here’s how I define the difference:

Policies are blankets. They don’t account for nuances or growth.  They leave little room for conversation or flexibility.

Filters are “if this, than that” parameters that lead to sound decision making based upon values or agreed upon standards.  Filters also increase accountability because they force discussion.

At Cross Point we’ve created filters for things like:

• Continued education and development.  Staff are encouraged to find ways to continue their personal development via books, conferences, etc.  They are given a few guidelines and budgets, but each staff person and their manager determine the best course of learning for them each year.
• Sunday staff schedules.  Based upon their role and responsibility we determine their work schedule for Sunday.  Some staff have greater responsibilities than others for Sunday services and we adjust their work week to make the best use of their time and contribution.

Before you implement policies, consider:

• Is this a black and white issue that will not require any exceptions?
• Is this policy likely to be broken often because, while it controls a bad thing, it inhibits another good thing?
• Am I creating a policy because it will keep me from having tough conversations?

When policies are necessary:

• When the policy is necessary to be compliant with a power higher than you, i.e. the law.  Implement policy when it’s necessary to make sure your team understands and is compliant with the law.  For example we have policies for expense report filing, “duty to report” circumstances and safety.
• When you face a repeated issue that doesn’t have many variables.   We have a vacation policy so that we are consistent with each staff member and accountable to those who fund our salaries through their giving.

How are you managing the tension of policies vs. filters?  It’s another tedious grey leadership issue!

When you have nothing to say, say nothing.

Sometimes I process in words.  Sometimes I process in quiet.

Today is a quiet day.  The last few days have been very busy with lots of talking and verbal processing, so tonight as I sit here planning what to share, I realize that I really don’t have anything to say.

And sometimes the best thing to say is nothing.

Since I don’t have anything to say, it’s your turn.

What’s on your heart or mind this week?

Who has had something to say that’s worth hearing?  Share the link with us!

Seth Godin

Bestselling Author; Squidoo Founder;
Renowned Marketing Blogger
New York, New York

With a #1 marketing blog, top 100 website Squidoo and twelve bestselling books (including The Purple Cow, Tribes, and latest release, Linchpin), marketing guru Seth Godin is one of the most imaginative free-thinkers in the world today. He makes a career out of perpetually re-inventing himself and his businesses—spreading powerful ideas and delivering something remarkable every day. Godin believes you can be remarkable too. He creates disequilibrium that pushes you to get grounded in what you believe, while firing up your creative prowess to face head-on the roadblocks in your ministry, work and life. Godin is contagious. Spend time with him and shake your brain.

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Session Notes: Poke the Box

Someone watching this today is going to change everything.

We’ve branded ourselves to death.

Revolutions destroy the perfect and enable the impossible.

We’re experiencing the death of the industrial age and it’s being replaced by a new age of tribes.

We still want what everyone wants – to be in sync.  We want to do what other people, our people, are doing.

These tribes need leaders.

The system of following the rules/mass production has infiltrated our churches.

We’ve created a culture that teaches people to fit in.

We have a choice in the post-industrial age to change some of these things.

There is no map for being an artist.

Competence is no longer sufficient to get a job.

Don’t wait to be picked.  Pick yourself.  If you want to write, write.

If you believe failure is not an option, then neither is success.

We are constantly looking for a reason not to do our art… a reason not to put it on the line.

If it’s worth doing, what exactly are you waiting for?

The world is begging for you to lead them!

This week in our Leadership at All Levels discussion we’ll discuss leading our peers.

Peer to peer leadership is where you work out your leadership influence.  We all start here and if we don’t learn in this environment, we’ll rarely be given opportunities to lead in other ways.

This is especially critical for multi-site environments where you have peers across multiple campuses.  You can’t rely on positional authority to work together, you have to develop relational authority.

Here are some ways that I believe you best earn relational authority:

1. Give and earn respect. 

Respect – to hold in esteem or honor.

Respect is earned by:

• Being consistent
• Being dependable
• Being accountable

Do what you say you’re going to do when you say you’re going to do it.

When you do things, do not let selfishness or pride be your guide. Instead, be humble and give more honor to others than to yourselves.  Philippians 2:3

2. Combat silos, don’t create them.

• We’re on the same team.  Don’t be territorial.  None of it is ours anyway.
• What are the qualities of a good teammate?  Be that for your team.

3. Communicate Clearly

• Share information.  People are down on what they are not up on.
• Have the difficult conversations.
• Be intentional.  Always ask: who needs to know this?  It is selfish to not think through who needs to know the information you have.

How are you developing relational influence with your peers?

Other posts in this series:

Leadership at All Levels (overview)

Leading Self

By nature, I tend to be obedient and compliant.

It wasn’t unusual for me to be the “teacher’s pet” or to be accused of “brown-nosing” as I climbed the corporate ladder.

I used to get really frustrated when others would make those accusations ,because really and truly I just wanted to do the right thing, to do the best job I possibly could.  And a little affirmation from those in authority isn’t a bad trade off for all that work.

I’m noticing a drift in the leadership season I’m in.  Standing a little further up the proverbial ladder, I’m not so much accused of these things as others are accused of sucking up to me.

With a different view and perspective, I’m realizing something very significant about this age-old element of human nature:

It’s not sucking up if you mean it.

I can tell the difference between those who just want something from me and others who sincerely want to do the right thing for God-honoring reasons.

But I’ve also noticed another little issue in all of this…

Some of the people who have the best intentions hold back from giving their best, affirming an idea, agreeing with a solution, offering praise or encouragement, etc because they are afraid of the perception of their peers.

It’s funny how so much of life comes back to the attitude and intent of our hearts.

God designed for us to live and work in community.  Beautiful, healthy, God-honoring relationships propel His work forward.

Don’t let the perception of others keep you from giving your best. 

Remember, it’s not sucking up if you mean it!

Oh my goodness!  I can’t thank you enough for your prayers and encouragement this week!

It has been a remarkable few days.

• Whiteboard was a lot of fun.  I just wish I could have stayed longer to hear the other speakers and hang out with all the rest of the attendees.
• Our Catalyst Dallas lab was a blast.  Bianca Juarez and Jo Saxton are precious!  Seriously wonderful conversation with these ladies.  If you don’t know them you need to.
• Dynamic Church Conference was wonderful.  The Fellowship Tech team are amazing!  The picture above is from my keynote talk.

I have been humbled this week by your prayers and God’s faithfulness.  It is one of the most beautiful feelings to be so loved that you are covered in prayer by friends and so humbled by a sense of God working through you.

Thank you

I sit here unable to write anything that feels significant.  It’s been this way the last couple of weeks.

I know why.  But I still try to force thoughts and ideas when honestly my attentions are directed elsewhere.

Today as I sat down to stare at the screen for another bout of writer’s block, I felt compelled to not try to drum up some clever idea or leadership principle, but to simply share why I’m somewhat quiet.

This week is actually a huge week for me.

I have more speaking engagements this week than I usually have in 6 months.  I have the privilege of speaking at Whiteboard in Atlanta, Catalyst Dallas and the Dynamic Church Conference.

I know that other people do this all the time, but for me… this is stretching.

I’ve been pouring my heart, soul and prayers into preparing and I simply am out of ideas for here on the blog.  (I hope you understand… I suspect you do.  You’re always more gracious with me than I am with myself.)

So, could I ask for your prayers?

I really long for your prayers to use these moments wisely… to speak things that need to be said rather than things I want to say… for God to do His work through me… for clarity of thought and calmness of spirit.

Sometimes I wonder how I get myself into these things – the things that you are dying to do as a writer and a communicator, but when the time comes, scare the pants off of you?  These are the moments that remind me that I need to live with “open hands” – open to the opportunities God places in my hands but careful to not take control and squash the life out of them.

Thanks in advance for your prayers.  I’m so grateful for each of you!

** And by the way, if you are going to be at any of these events, will you please say “hi”.  It would be great to see a friend

Accountability.

Our American independence revolts at the idea of this word.

I think sometimes we assume that the more autonomy you have in your job the less accountable you need to be.

I believe the reverse is true – as your responsibility increases so does your accountability.

We are all accountable to someone.

• If you are alive, you’re accountable to a family member (except perhaps in some extreme case of loss or dysfunction)
• If you are married, you’re accountable to your spouse
• If you have a job, you’re accountable to your boss
• If you are a pastor, you’re accountable to your governing structure and/or your congregation
• If you are a business owner, you’re accountable to your customers
• We’re all accountable to God

Key Components of Accountability:

1) Communication

Communication is powerful.  If you are being diligent to keep whomever you are accountable to informed of necessary information (good or bad), you will earn their trust and respect.  If you fail to do this you leave a gap of distrust.

2) Respect

It’s about respect.  If you don’t give it, you most likely won’t receive it.  If you’re not accountable, you’ll probably be micro-managed.  Our culture tends to scream in opposition to micro-management, but I think more often than not, we bring it on ourselves.  If we are not being accountable and informing those whose authority we are under, we leave them no choice but to micro-manage us.

How do you feel about accountability?  What makes you want to be accountable?  What causes you to resist accountability?

It’s not too late to register to join us THIS Wednesday, March 2nd for Turning Points!

Turning Points is a FREE online conference where you’ll hear stories of  how other leaders navigated a season of change.  Be inspired.  Be encouraged… and while it’s all women speakers, don’t be fooled – this conference is for men too!

Register HERE!